How To Be WellnStrong

104: Why Rhythms Beat Routines | Asheritah Ciuciu

• Jacqueline Genova • Episode 104

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Have you ever felt burned out in your faith—or like your relationship with God feels a little flat? In this episode, I sit down with my new friend, author and speaker Asherita Ciuciu, to talk about burnout, joy, and why spiritual rhythms matter more than rigid routines. We discuss the story behind her book Delighting in Jesus, how to reconnect with God when your faith feels dry, how to discern whether a thought is from God or not, and simple practices for releasing anxiety and mental overload.

If you’re craving a more grounded, sustainable way to walk with God—especially in a season where faith feels routine or uninspired—this conversation is for you.

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*Unedited Transcript*

[00:00:00]

Jac: What does it truly mean to be well and strong? Not just embody, but in mind and spirit? Welcome to the How to Be Well and Strong podcast. I'm your host, Jacque Will and Genova. After my mom's breast cancer diagnosis introduced me to the world of integrative medicine, I saw how important it is to have a clear, trusted roadmap for true healing.

Now I'm bringing those insights to you On this show, I sit down with some of the leading voices in wellness, mental health, and faith to help you find the motivation and tools you need to thrive. Get ready to be inspired and encouraged because your journey starts now. Have you ever felt burned out in your.

Or like your relationship with God feels a little flat. In this episode, I sit down with my new friend, author, and speaker as Sida Chuchu to talk about burnout, joy, and why spiritual rhythms matter more than rigid routines. We discuss the story behind your book, delighting in Jesus, how to reconnect with God when your faith feels [00:01:00] dry, how to discern whether a thought is from God or not.

And simple practices for releasing anxiety and mental overload. If you're craving a more grounded, sustainable way to walk with God, especially in a season where faith feels routine or uninspired, this conversation is for you. Let's get into it. Well, to kick things off, um, as I initially was telling you, I feel like our conversation is so timely because it is January of a new year, and I'm sure many listeners like myself are all about creating new routines and new habits and new rhythms.

And like I said, I came across your book Delighting in Jesus, which I cannot put down when I bought it. And. I thought it was so helpful. Um, so I immediately was like, I wanna have this woman on my podcast, but it's called lighting in Jesus rhythms to restore joy when you feel burdened. And I shared with you that I'm doing well and strong full-time now.

Right. I've been doing it full-time for the past year, and burnout, uh, is a [00:02:00] great word to describe what I've, what I felt. Um. You know, pretty often over the past year or so, and I know that many listeners, whether they're entrepreneurs or full-time moms or in the corporate space, you know, struggle with that as well.

Um, so all that to say, I'm excited to talk about all things burnout, all things rhythms with you today. But before we kick things off, I always love hearing a bit about your background, um, you know, beyond what you listed in your book and on your, your social space. But how did you find yourself? Um, why did you write this book Loaded Questions?

Asherita: Well, um, first of all, Jacquelyn yeah, thank you. Thank you for having me on and for talking about this. Um, it's. It coming at it from like the delighting Jesus part. Um, that's something that I always wanted to talk about, um, always wanted to share about or write a book about because it's kind of baked into my identity.

Um, my name Ashita [00:03:00] means God is so pretty, my happiness. Thank you. Thank you. My dad made it up. And so that's kind of felt, um, kinda like a blessing that my parents spoke over me for my life, that I would live to discover this truth, that God is my happiness. Um, so this, this theme of discovering joy in Jesus and, and finding our true happiness in him has always been just central.

To my life and my relationship with God and my work as an author and a speaker, and the work that I've done over the years. Um, and so I had contracted to write a book around this theme of joy and delight from a biblical perspective. Um, but as it happened, when the time came for me to actually write the book, I experienced, um, just physically in my body, I was not in a healthy place.

Um, I. I went to, I wanna say like 10 different specialists in the course of a year, [00:04:00] trying to figure out this list of symptoms. And no one could really, everything from a cardiologist to a pulmonologist, to, um, someone trying to figure out hormones to like a GYN doctor and, and no one could pinpoint all the tests.

Came back great, but I was flat on the couch every afternoon, not able to get through a day. Um, and so physically, um, I was not, well, emotionally and mentally and spiritually, I was not well, and it, it felt like this heavy space to be in where I still believed. Intellectually that God is my happiness, but I was not living in that happiness.

I was not in that space where I could say I'm overflowing with the joy of God in my life. I was very much in that space of feeling like my body was broken, my spirit was broken. I was burnout, and I was [00:05:00] carrying so many heavy burdens. So your question of like, where did this book come from? I'd always wanted to write a book.

But it ended up just being like, ground zero. Is this actually true? Like when everything falls apart, does what the Bible actually say about finding our joy in Jesus? Is it actually true? And um, I was talking to my husband about it 'cause this is. Not my first book. I've written multiples up, up to this point, and we were having a conversation, like, I, I'm okay actually returning the advance to the publisher and saying, find someone else, like, find another gal to write the book.

Because I am not in a place where I, I, I don't just wanna write it from a, like, technically this is true, like if I am not living it. I don't wanna write about it. And the publisher was so kind to say, Ashita, take as much time as you need. But, um, we are joining you in prayer, [00:06:00] believing, uh, because my prayer was, God, would you restore to me the joy of my salvation?

Would you restore the sparkle to my eyes? And unless you do that, I'm not going to write a book about it. Um, and so my publisher was like, ASTA, we're gonna join you in that prayer and we're just gonna wait. Forgotten to answer that prayer. And when he does, then you'll write the book. Um, and so this is a very, very long answer to say, and that is why I wrote the book, because God indeed did restore health to my body and health to my mind, and health to my heart and joy.

Um, joy to my heart, a sparkle to my eyes. And I've seen so many women around the country. Who struggle with this and struggle in hopelessness thinking that there is no hope that, that, that they just need to kind of push through. Uh, because this is the lot in life because life is hard because we are all carrying heavy burdens and, and it's true.

Life is hard and we will all be broken [00:07:00] at some point or another. But Jesus has come to restore what is broken, and he is the one who wants to offer freedom and joy and, and that is my heart. That is why I wrote this. That is why I, I was so excited, Jacqueline, that you wanted to have this conversation because I truly believe that he wants to offer more.

So much more than we could ask for or imagine.

Jac: That's a beautiful story. Yeah. That just reminds me, my Aunt Maryanne always says it's like her, her live by slogan. Life is hard, but it's also beautiful, right? Mm-hmm. And it's remembering that like in the, in the hardest of moments. Um, last year was definitely a challenging year for my family, so I certainly, you know.

You have to go through some hard things, right. To actually really see joy. And it's funny too, I do this practice where I choose a word for the year. I don't know if you've done that iida, but highly recommend it. Mm-hmm. So, yeah, wonderful practice. All that to say, my word for last year was joy, right?

Mm-hmm. And at the end of each year, I reflect on, you know, how that word showed up. And interestingly, last year, [00:08:00] my, my message was that I learned that joy and grief can coexist. Right. And again, it was just very enlightening, um, for me to, to realize that oftentimes like joy is also found through grief in a crazy way that no one would ever otherwise expect.

Um, but I love that you also like, you know, joy, when I was reading your book, I was like, joy, joy, joy. Like all of your insights were insights that I also gleaned from last year. So it was very special for me as well. But with that one thing, I, I do wanna just. Kick things off with is this concept of rhythm, right?

Mm-hmm. And if you're anything like me, like I'm a huge like Mark Batterson fan, um, Norman, Vincent Peele, like I'm all about how do you optimize your time to get as much done as you can? And, you know, how do you habits stack? And you know, I know you had a quote from James Clear in your book, and I was like, this woman clearly likes the same type of authors I do.

But with that ashita like. You talk about [00:09:00] rhythms instead of these rigid routines. Mm-hmm. What's the difference and why does that distinction matter so much, especially for women who are like, in very, very busy seasons of life or in periods of transition?

Asherita: Yeah. Um, well I think some of it might just be the way that we frame, um, this, but for me, when I think of routine, it's like a very.

Structured rigid approach to, first I do this and then I do this, and then I do that. And if, if one of these habits that you have stacked up or if part of what you have so carefully, like architected for yourself, for your life, if part of it falls apart, then it feels like everything else crumbles. Um, and.

I have experienced that in my own life where I, I can sit down and create my ideal schedule, right? This is my ideal week. I'm gonna wake up at 6:00 [00:10:00] AM and then I'm gonna do this wonderful morning routine mm-hmm. And take care of my skin and drink my chia, lemon water, and, you know, all, all these things.

Well, what if a, a child wakes up with a fever in the middle of the night? It well then. That kind of all falls apart when I think of rhythm. Instead, I think of it kind of like a wave. There's this ebb and flow, uh, give and take. It's, it's a more organic approach of saying instead of all or nothing, instead of a rigid, like blocks of time and it must look like this.

Uh, it's a more responsive, organic way of saying, how am I invited to show up today? In relationship, um, in response to what God has already done. Um, and so the way that I, I think of rhythms of delight specifically in relationship with God in contrast to some spiritual disciplines or spiritual routines, um, [00:11:00] if I can like contrast those, it's on the one hand, especially at the start of a new year.

We might have like, oh, I want the routine of reading my Bible every day. So we are going to like have this, you know, plan of day 16. This is what I'm reading in my Bible day 17. This is what I'm reading. Well, what if you fall behind one day? Well then now you need to on the next day double up and catch up.

Well, what if somehow you fall like five days behind? Now you have to catch up five days. 'cause that rigid routine has no give in it.

Jac: Right.

Asherita: Whereas a rhythm, the way again that I have thought of it in the way that this has just helped me to reframe is to say, what is the Bible, if not God's invitation, that we know him.

If it's not his revelation of who he is, because he wants us to get to know him, so does he care whether you read the Bible in [00:12:00] 365 days or 385 days? Like is he up there checking a list to see where you are at, or does he care about whether you. Coming to him with an open heart saying, God, I wanna know you today.

I, I, I don't think God really cares whether you read the Bible in a year or not. I don't think he cares if you read a chapter today or if it's a verse in, in fact, God says that it, I think this is in first Chronicles. The eyes of the Lord roam the earth, looking for the one whose heart is devoted to him.

So it's really a response of saying today, God, today you want to reveal yourself to me. I get to open my Bible, whether that's for five minutes or 50 minutes, whether it's first thing in the morning or for some reason my routine fell apart and I'm in the carpool line. Mm-hmm. Ready to pick up the kids and, and this is my last moment of quiet, but [00:13:00] instead of scrolling on Instagram, I'm gonna quiet everything and just take a few minutes to your face because this is my.

Relationship of wanting to seek you. Yeah. It's a different mindset, Jacqueline It. It's this ebb and flow, this wave of constantly he's seeking us and we're responding by coming back to him.

Jac: Yeah, I love that. That's so good. And also too, I mean, it's funny you bring up the reading the Bible in a year, because that is something I am attempting to do this year.

And it's funny because Yeah, no, it definitely is. But I, I love that you said, does it really matter if it's like 385 days or 365 days? Because I agree and the answer is no. And I feel like the more I stick to like the rigid routine of it, like today you have to read X, Y, and Z. The more it becomes like a, oh, you have to check the box.

Right. Did my Bible reading check? And like that completely defeats the purpose. And I forget what it was exactly that you said. It was like, if we're simply like doing quiet time because [00:14:00] it's good for us, right? Like we're missing the point. Um, and that's so true, right? Because then if it becomes like a task to complete, like it's just, it's just that, right?

Like there's no conversation involved in it. Um, so one thing that has personally helped me as well. Is I have this thing of like, this new concept of like prayer walks, right? Like that's mm-hmm. That's a practice of mine, rather than just sitting on my sofa or like, you know, on my knees at night. I love walking outside and that is my favorite time to talk to God, right?

Instead of having a podcast or music playing. And I feel so much more connected with him because I'm out in nature, right? And just like that's, that's my form of like my favorite. Way to talk to God. And obviously it looks different for different people, but you know, through the concept of rhythms, right?

And the sense of like, wherever you feel most connected to Jesus, like whether that's on a walk, whether that's in your bed at night before you go to sleep, or you know, in your morning traditional time. Like he just wants a conversation with you and he wants to just talk to [00:15:00] you and he also wants you to listen as well, right?

Asherita: Yeah. Yeah. Jacqueline, I would love to hear more, um, because I find, I find it so. Like we can have this. Formula or stereotype in our minds of what we think the perfect quiet time looks like. Um, so I'd love to hear more. What does it look like for you to go on a prayer walk with God? Like what do you, are you talking out loud?

Are you that lady who's like walking and talking like a quiet prayer?

Jac: That's, that's me. And you know what the funny thing is? I've gotten to a point now, I mean, I'm 30 and I feel like the older I get, like the less I care what other people think. So like, you will see me literally walking down the street talking and like, I'll get looks from people, right?

Like, who is she talking to? Like, don't have my AirPods in or anything. Just, just talking and I'll just like, you know, wave hello to people on the, on the way. But I'm like, I promise I'm not crazy. But though I, I like talking out loud to God because it also like helps me hear my own thoughts, right? Mm-hmm.

[00:16:00] And like in the same sense that they say like, the practice of writing right is incredible just for releasing what's on your mind. I feel like just talking out loud. Does the same thing. Right? That's why therapy can be really helpful for a lot of folks 'cause you just get it out of your head. Um, so yeah.

But, but interestingly too, ashita, and I'd love your take on this too. I find, and I'm sure many people do that, I do more of the talking than the listening. Right. And that also is, is on my heart this year to really figure out. How, how do I hear from God? Because obviously not every thought is from God. And you talk about that in your book as well, but how do you discern, right, if a thought is from yourself or if it's from God, um, and what does, what does that look like, right?

Does it look like just sitting in silence? Like, does it look like reading a verse and then meditating on it? And again, I know. That's an ambiguous question, and it's different for every person, but I don't know, like what works for you because again, that's something that I'm really trying to, to get better at [00:17:00] this year.

Asherita: Yeah. Yeah. I love that you brought this up because this, this is like one area of my relationship with Jesus that I feel like I've grown so much in just the last six months really, of last year. Um, and for me. I, I, for me it's journaling. Like I, that's why I asked you about talking out loud, because I'm like, I

Jac: can't, I love journaling.

Aida. I have like, you don't, like, I, I wish if you were in my apartment right now, you would like think I'm, well actually you wouldn't 'cause you love journaling, but I have like five or six different journals. Like they're all dedicated to different things. Like I have a awesome pre bedtime time journal. I have like, yeah, a lot of them are from Stephanie May Wilson too.

'cause I, I love her, her stuff, but. I, yeah, I'm cool. I'm a huge journaler.

Asherita: Yeah. Yeah. So, um, I actually have a stack over here, um, that's about that big from, from last year, um, that I wanna go back through and look at and just spend some time thinking through. So some things just from last year that I feel like [00:18:00] have been helpful, um, is when I feel like a thought is coming from the Lord.

Um, I will write it in all caps. So that's just like one thing that distinguishes it from my handwriting in my journals. Um, I have a friend who will mark it like with a star, so just she can like, set it apart that way, but just some way of, um, visually distinguishing this, I feel like is, is coming from the Lord.

Um, so that's one thing. Another thing is oftentimes it's scripture. Um, that he brings to mind, and I cannot encourage listeners enough to be memorizing scripture. Um, the Bible is God's word for us. It is the revelation of the heart of God. Like, if you want to know what God's voice sounds like, read the Bible.

If you want your heart and your mind filled with the voice of God, memorize. [00:19:00] Memorize portions of scripture because the, the rhythm and the cadence and, and the voice of God, it, it's in scripture that that is what he provides for us. Um, so I feel like my confidence in discerning the voice of God these last six months has grown because I can.

More easily thread it to scripture and say, does this align with God's word? Now if you're listening to this and you're like, Ashita, I, I'm brand new to the Bible, like I, I don't know if something's in the Bible or if it's in Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings, like, or maybe it's a Chinese proverb. It sounds like it could be true.

Um, then this is where community comes in. Um, as you're sitting in prayer and you're praying, um, it. And you feel like a thought is coming and you think this might be from the Lord. Um, again, [00:20:00] writing it down is helpful to just kind of capture it however you want to set that aside visually, whether all caps or with a star.

Um, and then bring it to your community of, of faith followers, of believers, of followers of Jesus and say, I was praying about this thing and here's what I feel like God spoke to me. Um. Does this, does this sound like him? Does this align with the Bible? Does this sound like what the Bible says? Because he will never contradict himself.

Um, we do know that he speaks to his children because in John 10, Jesus says, I'm the good shepherd. Um, my sheep hear my voice and they follow me. He says then in John 13 and 14 and 15, that he'll send the Holy Spirit to guide us, to teach us, to instruct us in all things. One of the names of Jesus that's given in Isaiah is, um, that he will be our [00:21:00] counselor.

So he will counsel us. So if there are areas of our lives, whether it's in our marriage or parenting or our health journey, like God cares about our health, he cares about, um, food fixation, or he cares about, uh, another addiction that we're having, he cares about the, the daily areas that were like, I just don't know how to break free from here.

He wants to lead and guide us to freedom. He will speak to us in those areas of our lives. Um, and I think sometimes he, he will offer personal guidance if we make time and space to listen to him. But his voice will always align with what he has made clear in the Bible and in scripture he'll never contradict himself.

So I wanna be very, very clear about this. Um. He's, he's not, if there's a voice in our, in my head that sounds like [00:22:00] something that feels good to me, but has been clearly revealed in the Bible to be sin. That is not the voice of God because he will not contradict himself. Um, but so very often the voice is that of the Good Shepherd.

He's the one who will be. Correcting me when I've gone astray. He's the one who will comfort me when I am grieving a sin in my life. He's the one who will lift my gaze and say, child, I've already paid for that on the cross, your sin is forgiven. Look at the beauty of righteousness. All these beautiful gifts that are ours.

Um, there's more that I could say, but, but I don't know. I love

Jac: that. No, no, that's funny. That's beautiful. That is so beautiful and so true. Um, going back to reading the Bible though. Yeah. So obviously some books are easier to read than others. You talk about this feast method, right? Or process. [00:23:00] Mm-hmm. When reading the Bible, like focus on God, engage the text.

Can you just go into that a bit more? For listeners who maybe like never have read the Bible before and they're just overwhelmed with these books like Leviticus and you know, a lot of the Old Testament scriptures, like how do they go about reading that? And I guess like knowing God through those things, right?

Because every book offers something different. Um, and another follow up to that, like what book do you recommend new believers start with if they were to just, you know, choose one book.

Asherita: I love this. I'm like, I'm settling in. 'cause this is like, let's go, let's go, let's do this. Um, so one of the, one of the things I wanna say is, uh, I've already said this, but I'll say it again.

The Bible is. The revelation of God for us, because he wants us to get to know him. Um, so one of the best ways that we can approach the Bible is by asking, what does this reveal about God? The Bible is one big story that points to Jesus. So [00:24:00] every single chapter, every single story, somehow. Points to the story of Jesus somehow houses its fulfillment in the story of Jesus.

And once you'll understand this about the Bible, it unlocks so much beauty. Even in a book of Leviticus, even in the book of Numbers or Deuteronomy or Ezekiel. Like what a bizarre book, truly. Um, but once you understand like, oh, all of this is actually pointing to. The one true story of Jesus, then it becomes a treasure hunt.

Um, so I teach, um, I'm part of my church's middle school team. I teach in our student ministry. Um, and what I teach students to look for is what we call hyperlinks. And I got this from, um, the Bible project, Tim Mackey and John Collins. Mm-hmm. And their team. Um, so when you look for like. When we're on the internet and we're browsing, a hyperlink will take you from [00:25:00] one page to another page because they're somehow connected in biblical times.

Um, the Bible is written by many, many authors over many, many years in different cultural context, and it's meant to be meditated on. It's meant to be a passage that you read one passage at a time and just kind of sit with it and think about it. And there are so many little gems that are hidden in each of these chapters in the Bible.

That are rich with hyperlinks that are not immediately visible to us. And this is just much harder for 21st century Christians because we're not familiar with the culture and the customs and the, the practices of the day that would've been safe for first century people. Um, but even for them, it, it was supposed to be.

Um, just a [00:26:00] practice that you would read a portion of the text and then you'd sit with it and think about it and think, Hmm, what does this remind me of? So for example, um, I sat with my children a couple days ago. We were reading through, um, the Passage and Acts where the Holy Spirit descends on the disciples and shows up as tongues of flatter.

And I was like, how? Weird. Like would you be freaked out if you'd be in the room and there's just like fire on top of your head? And they're like, yes, agreed. This is bizarre. And so I asked them like, where else in the Bible do we see fire? And so we started thinking. Where else do we see fire? And we thought about, oh, when Elijah calls down fire on the altar and it burns up the sacrifice.

Hmm. That's interesting. Oh, we see fire when God leads the people out of Egypt. The wilderness and he leads them by a, a [00:27:00] pillar of cloud by day and a pillar of fire by night. Interesting. Oh, there's fire that comes in the temple and that's fire there. And, and so they listed out several stories and again.

And I'm gonna say, this is so cool because for a long time my children were getting bored at Sunday school. They're like, mom, they keep telling the same stories over and over again.

Jac: How old are your kids, by the way?

Asherita: Oh yeah, they're 12, nine and seven.

Jac: Oh, okay. Okay. So those are ages where like they're old enough to like grasp and understand the Bible, but like young enough to still like not be able to form like their own opinion.

Right.

Asherita: Yeah. Yeah. So for the, for the early years, it was a lot of just telling, telling them the stories and telling them over and over again. Um, but what I would do when they were young is try to show them how every story points to Jesus. The Jesus Storybook Bible does a [00:28:00] great job of this. Are you familiar with it?

Yeah, so the Jesus story book Bible, just every story is pointing to Jesus. But now that they've heard this, the same stories, this repetition over and over again, now we can do this fun hyperlink sort of challenge where we take something like fire or we take something like lions or stones and think, where else have we seen this in the Bible?

Um, so all of this to say fire then represents the presence of God. In all of these stories, fire represents the presence of God and because in that story, in Acts two, it was the presence of God was then filling people for the first time, the Holy Spirit in dwelling them. And that's invisible fire then was the.

Physical manifestation of that so that everyone could see like, oh, it's not just me, it's you. Like he filled you too. Yeah. It's all of us. Um, so I share that to say as if you're new to the Bible and you're getting to these parts of, [00:29:00] of like Leviticus or Numbers or Ezekiel and you're like, this is weird. I, I don't know what to do with the story.

The story of a lot in his daughters, like, what? Why? Um, I, I just wanna encourage you. We, we don't need to immediately like get an application out of every Bible reading. We can sit with a passage of the Bible and. The one question that I encourage every student of, of the Bible, and this is what I encourage my children to do, my students in middle school, my women in Bible study, when I travel the country at conferences, this is the one question that we always ask of the text is, what does this teach me about God?

Because ultimately the Bible is one big story that points to Jesus. And in every story we can see something about the heart of God, even if we don't understand all of the [00:30:00] details. And some days that's gonna be really easy, and some days it's gonna be kind of hard. Um, and on those really hard days, I like to picture Jacqueline a treasure test.

Um, that I am taking questions or particularly difficult passages to the Lord, and I'm, I'm putting it in a treasure test. I'm like, I don't get this. Maybe sometimes I don't even like this, like this does not. This does not seem like you, some of the Old Testament laws are like, what? But, but I'm gonna put it in this treasure chest and I'm gonna let it sit there and I'm gonna trust that in time, in time, you're gonna reveal what this, what this teaches me about your heart.

And I've had the experience sometimes, um, years later, years later, that I'll come to a passage. It'll be like reading [00:31:00] it for the very first time.

Jac: Yeah. I'll be like, I was just gonna say that. Yeah.

Asherita: I've read the Bible multiple times. Where has this passage been? Right? My whole life.

Jac: Yep, yep, yep.

Asherita: It's like discovering it for the first time and you open the treasure test and it's like, here's this treasure.

So don't be discouraged if you read something and it doesn't make sense. Like that's part of the beauty that will never master the Bible. We'll, never like. Have arrived or, or gotten to a place where we don't need it anymore. Uh, it, it continues to teach us. And so you did ask about the feast method, and I didn't get to that.

I'll say, if you have a whole lot of time and you want to dig really deep into a passage, then you can do an inductive method and we can walk through that if you want. But more and more, Jacqueline, what I'm finding is I would rather encourage people to be in the word. Every day. And to get the word into them every day and to spend time meditating on what does [00:32:00] this teach me about who God is?

Jac: Yeah.

Asherita: And then how is God res like inviting me to respond to him? Yeah. Like it, if God has sent down, he's fire from heaven to fill his people with his own presence and his own spirit. And if that is true of everyone who is part of his family today, then. Maybe I can think about what's one way that Jesus invites me then to like, what's one thing he's invited me to do today?

Jac: I love that.

Asherita: I, I would rather think of it that way. One thing that this passage teaches me about God, one thing that he's inviting me to do in response and then ending with, what's one thing I wanna say to God in response? Yeah. What Bible's, God's revelation to us. What's something I wanna say back to him?

Jac: I love that. I mean, at its, at its core, like it just simplifies everything, right? And like you're more likely to do something if it's a simple task. So read a passage and write what is one [00:33:00] takeaway. Um, one question I did have for you as you were just talking about scripture. I have a lot of Bibles, isda and some of them, well most of them have like the separate excerpts, right?

From like different people that write their own like interpretation of like, oh, this is the takeaway from this, or, you know, a lesson, which like, I think can be helpful, but I don't know what, what are your thoughts on that? Like for someone reading the Bible for the very first time, like, would you.

Necessarily choose a Bible that has those like other insights from other people? Or would you choose a Bible that is literally just scripture and this way, like you're not like, I guess like tempted to just read like the excerpts or the fast, you know, insights rather than actual scripture itself.

Asherita: Are you talking about like devotionals on the side or like study notes?

Jac: Yeah,

Asherita: that go over as by verse.

Jac: Let's say devotionals more so do devotionals.

Asherita: Yeah. Yeah. Um. I, Jacqueline, I'm, I'm gonna say there isn't like one right or wrong way to do [00:34:00] this. Um, I just want to see. People in the word of God every day. Um, when I was growing up, I had a study Bible and it took me, I think, maybe three years to read through the Bible the first time because I went really slow and I would read a few verses and I would write down, um, in my notebook, like just phrases that stood out to me.

And then I journal like. What stood out to me about it, and then I'd write another phrase, another verse, and what stood out to me about it. And I would read the study notes as I went, and it really. Taught me how to understand some of those more difficult parts of the Bible. And I was okay with not speed reading it in a year, you know?

Jac: Yeah.

Asherita: Um, so I would say if you, it, it, it might be like an individual thing. If you're finding, like, it's really getting in the way of me reading the Bible, 'cause I'm only flipping through and reading the devotionals and that bothers me. I feel like God is inviting me to really [00:35:00] focus on his word instead, then pick a Bible that.

Doesn't have that and allows you to focus on just the text, but I know for a lot of people that can feel intimidating and the devotionals and the study notes just kind of have like that supplement guide

Jac: you, right?

Asherita: Mm-hmm.

Jac: Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah, no, that makes sense. Switching to emotions, reida. So, okay, we're kind of jumping around.

We're we. Burnout. And now we're talking about emotions, but I mentioned last year was a, a challenging one for my family. All that to say, um, a lot of conversations I've had since have to do with conversations around grief, right? Mm-hmm. And how to draw near to God rather than away from God. And seasons of grief.

So beyond grief, for women who are just like discouraged right in, in life, who are just overwhelmed, how do they not feel like they're like failing spiritually? Like for women who are just like. Overburdened with life, right? Yeah. And they're just like in a, in a valley. What would you tell them if, [00:36:00] again, like they wanna still have a close relationship to God, but they feel like these emotions are just like impediments, right?

That is just preventing them from, from really seeing God. Whether that's like showing up in their lives or whether they're questioning him, that, you know, he permitted something to happen that they otherwise wouldn't have wanted.

Asherita: Yeah. I think Jesus wants you to experience him in the midst of those emotions.

Not for you to like get over that and then experience him. Um, when we read the gospels again and again, it is in people's. A place of need and desperation that they reach out to Jesus. It, it's not the people who are healthy, who need a doctor. Jesus says it's not those who, um, are rich, who look for help.

It's not those who have their life altogether that feel like they need a savior. It is exactly those who are broken and destitute. Who are in a place of [00:37:00] desperation, who acknowledge that they need Jesus. In fact, when we look at Matthew five, that is part of what's so remarkable. About who Jesus says the kingdom of God belongs to.

He says it. It is those who are blessed or the poor in spirit. If you feel like you are burdened and broken and burned out, Jesus says the kingdom of heaven belongs to you. Uh, it's not because. It's the Beatitudes always struck me as bizarre because I was like, I don't feel particularly happy when I'm in that place.

This feels really weird to say, um, but the way that Jesus is presenting this is saying if you are in a place where you feel burdened and just at the end of yourself. That is the exact place in which you can experience the fullness of what I have come to give you. If you are in a place where you are hungry to see the world [00:38:00] made, right, where you see the news every day and your stomach is twisted saying, how long, oh God, how long is this gonna continue?

Well then you are in the place where you get to experience that God is indeed going to come. And make things right, like when you are in that place of, of disappointment, of grief, of lament, Jesus says, that is the place where I want to come and meet you. So we are blessed, not because the hardship is the blessing.

Rather the hardship is what brings us into the place where we get to experience the presence of Jesus. And the presence of Jesus is the blessing.

Jac: Yeah.

Asherita: It is that thing that brings us to the end of ourselves where we realize every self salvation project, every way that we've tried to improve ourselves has fallen apart and [00:39:00] we have nothing other than Jesus to cast ourselves on.

And so we do. We reach out to him and Jesus says, now, now you're in a place to receive everything that I wanna give you, and that is why he calls us blessed. Then he says, that is who I have come for, are those who know that they need me. And when we look at these encounters in the gospel, it's. It's the marginalized, it's the hurting, it's the sick, it's the grieving, like those are the ones that Jesus reaches out to again and again.

Those are the ones that he flings out his arms and he's saying, come to me. Come to me if you are weary and heavy burdened, and I will give you rest if, if you feel like you can't keep going on anymore, put your burden down and step into yoke with me Step. Side by side with me and why don't [00:40:00] you walk with me.

Let me carry the burden, come and carry my burden, which is, uh, a first century way of saying, love God and love me, and love your neighbor. I will give you rest, learn from me. I, I am gentle and humble and heart. I'm not a harsh task master. I'm not gonna push you to go harder to run in another lap that's not in the heart of Jesus.

Jac: Yeah.

Asherita: Let me bring healing and restoration. And so if you're in that place where you're like. I, I don't, I don't know that I can experience Jesus because I'm experiencing all these hard emotions. Jesus is looking at you saying, that's exactly where I want to meet you. Come to me. Bring those emotions to me.

Let me heal and restore in that place.

Jac: Yeah. That's so good. This may sound like a silly question, Ashita, but one thing that comes to mind is, and you highlighted it before, but you [00:41:00] know Jesus, is to cast our anxieties on him, right? Like release our burdens to him. What does that actually look like? Like tactically, like how does one literally like give their burdens to God?

Right? And I know it's a daily decision, right? Of what we choose to focus on and taking our thoughts captive. But just like for you, right? Like how do you really cast your burdens on God? Like is there a routine you do? Is there something you think when you just feel overcome with everything on your plate?

What does that look like for you?

Asherita: Oh, do you wanna do it right now?

Jac: Yeah, let's do it.

Asherita: Okay. All right. So I call this p Palm Stone Palms Up. Um, and it's not my own idea. I think it's Richard Foster that I first heard it from. Okay. Um, so if you're listening to this right now. But I want, if you're in a safe place, like you're, if you're driving, just imagine yourself doing this or wait.

But if you're in a place where you can do this, um, what I want you to do is put out your hands in front of you. Um, and if you're able to close your eyes and just [00:42:00] take a deep breath and just imagine yourself in God's presence, whatever heavy burdens that you're carrying. We talked about the heavy emotions and the brokenness and the burnout and the grief and disappointment, all of it.

Just all those heavy things and picture all of them, whatever it is that kept you up late last night. Whatever worries were on your mind first thing this morning. Whatever that task is that is pinging in your brain right now that it's like, I don't, I, I don't have time for this. I need to go through that thing, that thing, that thing.

Picture yourself, taking that in your hands, hold onto it, and then palms down. Picture yourself, placing that into the hands of Jesus. He's holding his hands out. [00:43:00] Just picture yourself putting that thing into his hands. And watch him take it from you. And then when you're ready, turn your palms up.

Feel the relief of not having to carry that thing anymore. It's in his hands. He can. He can carry it. He's capable and palms up. Take a moment and ask him, is there anything that you want to give me instead?

You know, if you gave him something that was a, a financial worry, then maybe you might want to hold onto the promise that he will provide for all of your needs that he cares for the birds of the air and the flowers of the field. He, he'll care for you if what you placed in his hands was a loved one, a child, or a spouse, or a [00:44:00] family member.

You might want to hold onto the promise that he loves them so much more than you ever could love them.

If you put into his hands a, a concern about your health or your body, you might want to hold onto the promise that he has counted every hair on your head that he knows every day of your life. Nothing happens without him knowing it. He knows everything about you.

So whatever that that promise is, whatever that reassurance is, palms up. Just receive that from him. What is it he wants to give you?

As you sit, palms up with him, maybe another thought came to mind, another worry. Maybe you have another burden that you wanna take palms down. You place it into [00:45:00] his hands. Picture yourself picking up that burden, just giving it to him saying, I don't wanna carry this anymore. It's too heavy for me, and you put it in his hands.

Calms down extra Jesus. In you of that burden, you don't have to carry it anymore. It was never yours to carry. Anyway, and when you're ready,

just take that deep breath, feel that relief, and turn your palms up. Is there anything else that Jesus wants to give you in exchange?

Is there a promise or a word picture, something that he's whispering to your heart?[00:46:00]

And Jesus, thank you that you carry our burdens for us. Thank you that we don't have to. You stand ready and willing to take them anytime, any day, and so I pray for it. Jacqueline, I pray for our listeners right now who have done this with us that we would not pick up those burdens again, that we would leave them with you, that we would hold onto these precious promises that you've given us.

Thank you that you invite us to cast our burdens on you every day, any time of day. May we be quick to run to you. We love you Jesus, because you first loved us. Amen.

Jac: I love that so much. I'm gonna go back and replay that like every single day now. And I, I physically feel, and I'm sure whoever was listening who did that along with us, like, you just feel lighter, you know?

And I love that [00:47:00] visualization component because that's, that's so, so powerful.

Asherita: Yeah. This is something Jacqueline that's so simple. You can do it at the kitchen sink, right? You can do it while you're folding laundry. You can do it in bed if you're trying to go to sleep. I had a season where I struggled with insomnia and just all these thoughts coming through my mind.

So just one by one, like grabbing them and putting them in the hands of Jesus and receiving what he wanted to give there is physiologically, there are things that happen to us as we breathe and as we quiet our minds and do this.

Jac: Yeah.

Asherita: Um, but spiritually there's, there's a release that happens too, so.

Yeah, replay this. Anytime. Bookmark this. Listeners, come back to it if you want to, but it's such a simple, practical way for us to do what Jesus invites us to. He invites us to come to him. He invites us to release these burdens to him. I think what we do too often though, and it's. I can say this 'cause I've done [00:48:00] this, is we feel this anxiety building up and we scroll on our phones instead, we numb out instead.

And he's saying, come to me. Just come to me. Just come and put these in my hands. I'll, I'll carry them for you.

Jac: So true. And this comes full circle too, but I mean we mentioned earlier about, you know, how do you hear from God? And it really is through silence, right? And I was talking with them, have you heard of Dr.

Caroline Lee? She's like, mm-hmm. This, yeah, I've been following her work Rashida for like the past decade or so, and I finally had the opportunity to like sit down and talk with her last week on the show, which was so fun. But you know, she's a huge advocate of neuroplasticity. And you talk about this a lot in your book as well.

Um. Where was I going with this? Oh, one of the questions I asked her was, you know, what is a healthy balance, right? Between like being overly stimulated, right? And like having silence because I just look at my day and when I really reflect on my day, I shared with her that I felt [00:49:00] like most of my day it's listening to a podcast, listening to music, like whether that's like Christian pop or classical while I'm working and I never have time for silence, right?

Because I found that like. When you're in silence, like the thoughts that you don't really wanna think about bubble up, right? Mm-hmm. And it's like, I feel like most people also too, like similar to what you were saying, like you suppress those thoughts 'cause you don't wanna deal with them. So you suppress it through stimulation, you suppress it through scrolling, you suppress it through like busyness.

But in reality the only way to really meet God is, is in silence. So it's about really taking that first step to like be more intentional. Um. And again, like, you know, she spoke about being an observer of your thoughts. Right? And that changes how you relate to them. So that was a, that was a fun conversation.

But yeah, I mean, I just, it's, it's given me a lot more, um, I guess clarity around, like the importance of, of silence in our, in our daily routines.

Asherita: I think we're afraid [00:50:00] of silence because that's where we face all the things that we've tried to ignore. But Jesus says that he's come to bring healing. He's come to free us from these things, but the way that's gonna happen is by us coming.

Face to face with them, but we don't have to face them alone, like we get to face them in his presence. We get to come to reality with the darkest, ugliest, scariest parts of of. Us of our past, of our fears, but we do it in his presence. And again, he's gentle and humble in heart. And when we do it with an awareness that Jesus is with us and, and sometimes with a friend, like if it's gonna be like a scary, hard thing that we need to pray through and pray for, release or pray for freedom.

Yeah. Or healing, like doing it with a friend is definitely the way to go. Uh, but just being aware. We get to do [00:51:00] it with Jesus. Then that receiving aspect is so important to Jacqueline. Like it's not just that we place it in his hands, we do, but then what is it that he wants to give us instead? And that is where we rewrite our thoughts.

That's where that neuroplasticity comes in. Like the brain changes its shape as our mind is renewed with truth, right? Like we start believing lies. We stop replaying failures, and we start believing. The promise that he's given us. And then we walk in the newness of life. We walk in a new way. Uh, that's where silence becomes beautiful then.

Yeah, it's no longer scary.

Jac: So true. And on that note too, I feel like, again, as I've gotten older, I'm also much more discerning about what I see and what I hear, right? Whether that's like a TV show, because everything gets imprinted in our minds, right? Mm-hmm. And I feel like people don't [00:52:00] realize, again, even the conversations with the folks around you, right?

That influences you. You know, show me the five people you hang around with the most and all, like that's who you are. Um, so all that to say, you know, holding onto truth, like through the bible, through community, through our friendships, through, you know, what we see, what we scroll on Instagram or social media like, it's so, so important to, to be guarded in that regard.

Asherita: Hmm. Yeah. Yeah. And I think the more, the more we surround ourselves with truth speakers and with others who practice the presence of Jesus too.

Jac: Yeah.

Asherita: Um, he's just been teaching me so much about love like that, that that's really what it comes back to. Like the world will know that you are my disciples if you have love for one another.

Jac: Yeah.

Asherita: Um, so that's, that's. Yeah. I feel like that's been his theme for me even just so far this year, is receiving his love, [00:53:00] uh, praying that God would expand my capacity to receive more of his love, uh, that I am, what, three, seven years old now? And for him to say like. Daughter, we've only been in the shallows like, are you ready to go in the deep?

I was like,

Jac: yeah,

Asherita: isn't there more?

Jac: Yeah,

Asherita: there's so much more so that I can receive more his love in order to pour out more of his love. Uh, for that to happen. There needs to be time with him. And that's not gonna be this checklist, right? It's not gonna be like, did I read my Bible and pray because I need to be a good Christian girl.

It's invitation to relationship. I delight in you. I have so much more to share with you. Do you want this? Do you want this? Because he's never gonna force us into it, but he wants so much more for us.

Jac: Yeah, I love that. And one verse that comes to mind when you mention love is, you know, perfect love, cast out fear, right?

Mm-hmm. And so many people today struggle with anxiety, and I [00:54:00] just think, again, like if you just shift your focus, like anytime you're in the dirt or in the weeds about a problem, like. Shift your focus to God and like when you recognize how big he is, right? Your problem becomes so trivial, right? In, in, in our minds, when we look at what he is done, you know, his past faithful works like not only in our lives, but people in the Bible.

It just, it changes the mountain in front of us into like this little tiny thing. We're like, oh, but we have God on our side. You know? He, he is faithful.

Asherita: Yeah. Yeah. And he doesn't bring shame. It's not like, oh, I can't believe I'm struggling with anxiety again. I can't believe I'm struggling with this again.

Yeah. Like, I must fix my eyes on Jesus. No, it's, it's in that inviting an awareness that Jesus is with you, like he's with you, and so because he's with you, then those anxieties become smaller. As you're aware of his presence with you, that fear starts to fade away. Um, so I just, I just wanna be so careful, like, this is not a place for shame.

This is [00:55:00] not a place for do more, try harder. Mm-hmm. This is, receive more of what he's already given you. He wants to give you so much more. So just again, expand my capacity for more of that. And let me keep shifting my attention back to you because you're already here with me. Uh, that's just. What an incredible invitation.

Jac: I love that. Ashita. This has been such an encouraging conversation. I just looked at the time, I was like, it's, how is it 3 48 already? But I, I know you have another meeting after this, so I'm not gonna keep you too long. But, um, before we wrap up, I wanted to ask, where can listeners find you? Where can they pick up a copy of your many books?

Again, delighting in Jesus is the one that I read. I'm excited to dive into your other ones, but where, what are all the places folks can find you? I'll, I'll link them in the show notes.

Asherita: Yeah. So, um, I'm on YouTube. You can just look for Ashita. I share more, um, Bible reading tips and how to yeah, build a rhythm of delighting in Jesus in prayer [00:56:00] and reading your Bible and all the things.

Um, and Substack is probably the best place. I send out two emails a month. Um, one is very devotional and kind of sharing what Jesus is teaching me. And the other one is more like. All things books and my love of reading and writing, I love

Jac: that.

Asherita: Um, so yeah, Substack and YouTube just look for Ash, Rita, and, um, I try to respond to as many comments as I can there.

So that's the best place to stay in touch.

Jac: Awesome. Well, again, I'll link all those in the share notes. Um, my very last question for you, and I always say this is my favorite one to ask, and that is, what does being well and strong mean to you?

Asherita: Um, I think it's. Receiving the fullness of life that Jesus came to give us.

He, he wants us to be filled with energy and strength and health to partner with him and the good work that he's given us to do. So, yeah.

Jac: Amen. I love that so much. Well arid. Thank you so much for your time. I'm so excited to share this [00:57:00] conversation. I hope to have you on again for round two because there's so much to dive into that we have not even touched yet.

But this is certainly a good start and again, I'm just, I'm so grateful for you and, and all the work that you're doing. It's encouraging many people, myself included, so thank you.

Asherita: Um, Jacqueline, thank you so much for having me on. It's my joy.

Jac: I hope you enjoyed this episode. If you would like to support the show, please subscribe, leave a rating and review and share it with others. Be sure to visit well and strong.com to access notes from the show and to stay current with new content. I'm so grateful you joined me. Be well and be strong.

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Jacqueline Genova

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